Enlightenment

I never meant to get in this deep.
I wanted butterfly wing briefness
a fluttering touch and go.

Instead I sucked in water like air
swimming in a pool of still deepness.

I looked at my own reflection on the surface
from under the water.

What I saw amazed me.

I have everything I need.

It's all laid out in a random pattern
spread out before me like a dropped deck
of worn old cards. My 52 pickup contains aces and jesters.

I'll take them as they come
gladly.
I will no longer wish for what
I cannot have.
In the end the Stones are right
You can't always get what you want
but if you try
sometimes
you just might find
you get what you need.
What I needed was faith in my strength
and an inventory of what I had.
What I have is a wealth of opportunity
love
curiosity
talent
strength
creativity.

What I need now are friends
to help me come out of my shell
to pull me out of myself
to distract me from the smoke and mirrors
that make up the inside of my head.

I'm almost ready to surface
to draw in air.
and I'm going to stay close to that water.
I want to drink deeply, and remember.